“More statues, more sculptures and even more figurines, when does this infuriating sea of slate end?” I shouted out while kicking the side of a very nasty looking one made of marble. That was a decision I came to regret. Searing pain blossomed up my foot when my big toe struck the hard surface. I cried out various explicates hopping around on one leg like a loon. Niall had the audacity to take pictures of the whole ordeal.
“Could you stop doing that? it is really pissing me off.”
“Sure, but I couldn’t help myself, that one looks like you.” He pointed at the stone fixture.
“That is just uncanny, where did it come from?”
“Probably the flowing cloth covered Wight we just had tea with.”
“You had tea, I had a vision about my queen getting hit by something powerful enough to trap her and break her hold on the world.”
“At this point I get the feeling that whoever is in power is getting desperate and impatient.”
I mulled this over his words in my head as we strolled down the hill towards another overgrown lush forest.
“There is something very mysterious about these woods, don’t you think? Maggot.” Said Jennyfer with the grace of a rock.
“That is so frigging awesome.” Shouted Niall.”It looks like a picture painted on glass got shattered and is now littering the forest floor.”
“I think you are quite right, the very odd thing is that the glass-like substance is not actually reflecting anything.” Was my reply after trying to look at myself in the mirror surface. All I could see was scenery. Jennyfer flew over and touched a piece with the dainty hand, which went straight through the surface. Even more curious was the fact that the limb did not stick out on the other side.
“I’m not sure what I’m even touching, but I do believe the location I can see depicted on the surface is another place entirely.” Replied the fairy. “Could you help me dislodge the man sized piece over there Niall? I really want to have a few in store.”
“Sure, sure. Kine would you kindly help me dig up this big chunk I’m looking at? I just have to pad it a bit first to avoid sharp edges and shattering, should it topple over.” Sure enough she eagerly began digging with an ice shovel and secured the piece with a rope made from vines, after Niall had secured the edges with some sort of foam. While this was going on I decided to pocket one minor piece for myself out of curiosity. My pockets were starting to bulge under all the stuff I had in there. I definitely need to procure myself a bag of sorts. I also began dropping rocks onto one that laid horizontal on the ground. It sounded like a good idea at the time. Curiously enough the stone kept going in a straight trajectory above ground on the other end. This was very confusing to me indeed and I had no idea why the stone did not lose momentum and hit the dirt when gravity began to pull. Naturally I did the only sensible thing I could think of. I dropped a big blazing bolt of fire into the glass and it kept going and going as well. Whether the surface is glass, or not is entirely up for debate. One I do not intend to have with my party, who had somehow turned the object into wispy motes of binary dissolving into nothing along with the shard.
“There we go, a job well done if I do say so myself.” Said Niall patting himself on the back.
“I am amazed and very confused about how well you rip reality a new orifice the moment I look away.” I replied as he summoned the object again.
“It works due to Magic!”
“Flog off.”
“Regardless. It is a very nifty thing we’ve acquired. I wonder where it would take us, do you recognize the location?”
“No I can not say I do, but we could check it out.”
“I would rather not do that at the moment, I’m curious about the forest though.”
Further into the green growth we came across a grisly scene of a woman that had been skewered by a jagged piece about the thickness of a hand. Niall took some pictures at creative angles and Jennyfer began to divulge a theory. “Judging by the scene in front of us I can only assume one thing.”
“What is that then?”
“She’s dead and died from blood loss after her spine got severed.”
“Astute observation, I am simply astounded by your deductive skills.” I said dripping with venom.
“Your sarcasm still sucks, but have you noticed the scorch mark and pattern the pieces form across the forest floor?”
“What about them?”
“This is most likely the epicenter of a huge detonation that smashed the mirror, glass thing into pieces.”
“Sensible and still very confusing. Did someone assemble a humongous glass mirror in the forest, one that reflects another place?”
“That certainly makes sense, there is hope for you yet blood worm.”
Is that an upgrade or a downgrade in her insane world of disliking my species?
“Your inherent human hostility does not do you any favours you know?”
“I do not give a three eyed donkey rump about how most mortals perceive me. In fact they do not, and should not. you’re one of the few exceptions.”
“Lucky me. You are still awfully condescending and it is starting to get old.”
“Fine, I will attempt to tone it down a bit, it’s such a pain to deal with short lived lower beings.”
“In your case that would be practically the entire universe.”
“It truly gives me a sense of superiority and privilege.”
With that attitude I expect her life to be cut significantly shorter. I almost wish I would be around to see it.
“Don’t think too hard about it, from my experience all fairies are assholes and work on some alien mentality that makes no sense for humans, luckily I have yet to meet the Shakespeare type of Fey folks.” Said Niall, putting a comforting over-sized hand on my shoulder.
“I can not say I have read those stories, but a classmate of mine loved his works a lot.”
“It is an acquired taste, due to how old it is, but the stories are still good, once you get past the flowery theater language.”
And after paying our respects to the fallen by having kine put the corpse six feet under. We kept going onward, dodging through the lush underbrush. After getting whipped by an entourage of twigs, getting snagged by a particularly gnarly one and having to brush leaves out of my hair, we managed to make it onto the road again. To my surprise there were several people out for a leisurely stroll. Either we are close to town, or this place is somewhat safe. That is what I hope at least, or I will have to deal with more corpses and it is not calming my nerves whatsoever. A tracksuit coated couple blissfully strolled down the road, nothing unusual about that. However they did not veer out of our way and crashed into Niall who was fiddling with his tablet. The man swore up a storm looking particularly miffed, gazed around himself trying to find the culprit. When he found none he brushed himself off and walked away with his date.
“You vicious bastard,” Shouted Niall behind him as Kine hoisted him onto his feet.
“Could it be that you suffer from being so unremarkable that people can not see you?”
“Nah, that explanation would only make sense if the result was consistent.”
“Magic it is then.”
“That excuse is getting old.”
“It is not beaten to death yet, it is still hanging on by a sliver.”
I take my verbal spar victories where I can get them.
Further downstream we arrived at a very distinct looking city full of blue people. The way the houses were built made the riverbed appear at ninety degree angles, clearly it was built like a grid. One thing I truly enjoy about traveling is to see new places. Especially places that I can survive and mingle with humans.
“Well, well, well, that explains what that potion spill did. I suppose I can put a note on the entry and call it a potent purple people potion.” Exclaimed Niall with a dramatic pose, giving the tablet a twirl.
“You are tuning into a monster, you know that?” I replied with a heavy sigh.
“Thank you, I take that as a compliment.”
The way the town was built left little room to walk past the buildings, unless you fancied a swim and the water was not inviting. Especially now that it made people blue, even worse it seems to be a Monday as well.
“Feeling blue Magellan?”
“Har, har, har, very funny. I am fairly certain this is all your fault.”
“Whatever do you mean?” He said innocently. “We have already established that fact, so what is your point?”
“I am just repeating myself and I am concerned that this will have some unfortunate consequences in the long run.”
“Worry not my good magician, the magical girls can take care of that and probably a good water filter.”
The hill behind the houses on the opposite bank had more rows of square buildings stacked like steps in a staircase. Each one had a distinct color and fancy ornate patterns. Naturally Niall wasted no time at all before snapping a slew of new pictures of the place and the people. Even that guy in the fancy robe pretending to be an ancient minister from a picture book if the poster was anything to go by.
“This is one magnificent tourist trap if I do say so myself, but a real pain to navigate with a vehicle. “
“Sensible design is not a human forte, when design takes over. Style over substance and all that. If nothing else, they have set up a triage station in an attempt to deal with the blue complexion.” Condescendingly said the fairy folding her arms to her chest. Annoyingly enough she had made an quite astute observation. We quietly made our way past the square and found a small seaside shack where we stopped for a snack. The man behind the cashier was a surprisingly plain looking fellow with no distinguishing features at all. Regardless he greeted us with a smile. “Out of town customers, how rare. What can I get you?”
I looked over the neatly laid out menu full of pretty food pictures. “I want to try out the sweet potato pie. It looks simply delicious.”
“Sure a serving for each of us then.” Replied Niall as I had my discolored skin patch scanned. “You look awfully masculine. Are you sure this is your name?”
“What can I say? My parents probably hated me.”
“I can’t argue that, enjoy your food. It will be done fairly shortly.” Replied the waiter strolling into the back.
“Are you sure there is no way to change the name?”
“Pretty sure, now stop talking to yourself.” The few people sitting on circular chairs around various tables gave us a curious look. Which Niall and Kine ignored, gobbling up breadsticks. The customers lost interest almost instantly and returned to their meal. I decided to not express my concern about how eerie this was, since the walls apparently have ears. Soon enough the waiter came out with three steaming hot servings of food. The meal smelled fantastic, sure the food Niall cooked up was edible, but the finish was lacking and the taste subpar. For the sake of avoiding an argument, I decided to not tell him that.
“Magellan, what is the difference between a mage and a magical girl?”
“Branding and tradition.”
“oh?”
“Yes, it harkens back to the origin story all children are taught at a young age.”
“Can’t find any faults in that.”
Kine was welding down her food with gusto, Niall was a lot more reserved, while the fairy was busy doing something. It was rather hard to tell, since she wore her visor and a smirk. At least I was avoiding another argument. Seems like the more ancient a being is the more the more entitled and prissy they become. There ought to be a way to make her more pleasant to deal with. I can not fault her knowledge and skills, even if she clearly intends to give me more body parts and compare me to insects. At least Kine is an open book that simply cares about copulation and magic. What imagination spawned her, because it was certainly not mine. After finishing up the food we left the stall in silence.
Shard World 